Lather, Rinse, and Repeat Every Day

July 31, 2013. 

    "To know one life has breathed easier because you have lived-

                             This is to have succeeded." 

I recently wrote about 6 inspirational quotes on white paper in colorful marker and hung them on my grey, cold, cement walls. I was getting desperate for something to boost my spirits since not much else has been working. I found them in the book, "Start Something That Matters" by Blake (forgetting his last name and don't feel like getting out of my mosquitero to look...McKoskie?) who is the founder of Toms shoes. Phenomenal book by the way, even if you don't want to start your own business.

But I found the above quote at the end of the book and literally almost dropped the book to the ant covered gallery floor... The other quotes I had we're great ("The more you give, the more you live" "Imagination is more powerful than knowledge" etc). But this one was different. It was exactly what I needed to hear. Exactly what I need to embed in my head and heart while I'm here fulfilling my service in the PCDR.

Each day I fill my head with uncertainties and worries that I haven't done enough. This damn Community Diagnostic has me going completely crazy. And while that is all on me, it's going to be okay. I'm pretty sure the Peace Corps isn't going to send me home if my presentation isn't perfect or if I didn't do enough interviews. 

So today I had my last day of summer classes. Knowing that only one kid from each class was going to show up, I decided it would be a fiesta day. I bought soda, suckers, and gum and brought books, puzzles, cards, Dominoes, paper and crayons, and a memory game. My plan? Refreshments, read aloud the book I love about a boy who eats books until he gets sick and then begins to read them, and play whatever they wanted to play. I also made silly little certificates congratulating them on passing summer classes :P

Alex came early so Samuel had a buddy to play with for his class. The three of us played for two hours straight. And for about a half an hour, they begged me to read more books aloud to them. 

Juan José came at his time and totally came out of his shell he had been hiding in all summer. His competitive nature busted through as he owned me in cards. Then Neftali (fifth grade) chose to read a book aloud himself. One that was above his reading level and quite long. Without a single complaint he continued to read each page and with a fluency I hadn't witnessed from him thus far.  After almost twenty minutes he finished and I could have broken down in tears (but I didn't!). With how short and infrequent the classes were, I hadn't expected to actually see much improvement from my students-which was okay since I'll be doing pull-outs during the school year to help more. But I saw it in him. And though he may not feel it yet, I hope that my (possibly over-) excitement made him see a little of the incredible spark he has inside him. 

We played Dominoes with Lili and David (Neftali then staying an hour after his normal class time and where he showed his insane mental math skills), I cleared out the classroom and headed home with my heart full. 

Or at least, I thought it was full. And then I ended the night with that quote. 

So the days when my vision and focus are on the looming task ahead of me and the cultural barriers that lie in-between me and reaching the sustainability goals of the Peace Corps, I must remember the little ones. With their Julie-melting smiles, contagious laughters, yearn for positive attention and love, and joy of the simple things in life; they are what matter in the end. If I only help a handful in two years, that's a handful more than if I would have stayed in the states... And with how I felt with the little improvement from Neftali? Wow... Here comes an emotional next two years.

Dad, I know you say this to me nearly everyday. I guess sometimes I just need to hear it, read it, forget it, live it, read it again, and listen to it 100X before it sinks deeper than my head and settles into my heart. And even though it hit me hard today and is happily sitting heavy in my chest, I know I'll need to be reminded again throughout my service.

So for my own sake, here it is again:

   "To know one life has breathed easier because you have lived-

                             This is to have succeeded." 

Lather, rinse, and repeat every day.

Buenas noches.