River! Lots of tag. I'm exhausted. And very full. Which also currently means fat.
June 26, 2013. Went arriba with Dulce's grandson, Joan, after we finished our hot chocolate and bread. I was left alone yet again but this time, I moved. Three times. And each time I traveled to where the group was, within minutes, they would move somewhere else... I know they all had stuff to do but man did that feel awful. Am I really that much of a burden? Is my Spanish really that bad that I'm not worth conversing with? Is my iPad that much better than me that when I'm there without it, I don't deserve any sort of recognition? Yea, the last one is probably true haha my iPad rocks.
So I left to go back to the house, Dulce was watching her novella, and I drowned myself in my awesome iPad until lunch. With a firm promise to myself that I would go see Linda later. I figured that would lift my spirits like it always does. Buuuut it rained a lot. Damn.
Also got my settling-in allowance but am not allowed to move out for another month and a half. Lame...
June 27, 2013. Today I traveled arriba yet again with Joan. We watched some TV and then a friend of the family who is some sort of lawyer came. They were chatting and suddenly my host mom went outside and retrieved two hens and they discussed which would be better to kill for food. Lili was super pumped and wanted to be the one who killed it. Thus began the second slaughtering I've seen here in the DR. Below you will find the step-by-step process of killing a hen for dinner in case the world is coming to an end and you don't have grocery stores or someone else to do it for you like normal. You're welcome.
Step 1: Retreive hen and feel around her parts to see if she has eggs all up in there. If she does, toss aside. If she does not (or at least not many), proceed to Step 2 ignoring the terror you see in her eyes as if she knows her fate. (though she kinda looks bug-eyed normally...)
Step 2: Place hen in a sac and hang on the wall like a hidden trophy until ready.
Step 3: Build a fire in the fogón.
Step 4: Place a giant pot with water over the fire and wait until boiling.
Step 5: Sharpen knife on the corner of the fogón.
Step 6: Find a bucket large enough to fit the hen inside and a lid.
Step 7: Remove hen from the sac (again, ignoring the bugging eyes full of fear). Grab the wings with left hand and pull behind her back. Then grab her head and pull backwards and tuck in between her wings so her throat is stretched and ready. Hold all with left hand and place knife in your right hand.
Step 8: Hover the hen over the bucket without the lid. Slice the kneck swiftly and drop quickly in the bucket. Just as quickly, place the lid over the bucket and hold down while the hen fights for her life, screaming (in a strangely human-like way) and eventually seizuring.
Step 9: When movement and noises cease, remove lid and drain the blood into the bucket. Then place back in the bucket with her head up.
Step 10: Take the boiling water from the fogón and pour over the hen. Swish and rub the hen with the water.
Step 11: Remove the hen from the bucket and place on a table. Peel the feathers off of the body (should slide off easily because of the boiling water) and the extra layer of skin off of the feet.
Step 12: Marvel at how fat she is and get really excited.
Step 13: Starting with the legs, begin to slice up the hen. Cut off the feet (and then each toe nail), the legs, then the wings in two, etc.
Step 14: Cut off the head and throw into fogón fire (the eyes no longer have life and thus no fear in them).
Step 15: Pull out the esophagus, and heart with it and toss.
Step 16: The stomach, liver, and intestines to follow. Save for mondongo (or however you spell that delicious delicacy).
Step 17: If there are some eggs (may vary in size and be yellow or orange with veins), remove and place aside. Don't exclaim too loud that there are some because the kiddos will come running excitedly and want them. But you must save them. For what, you ask? Use your imagination. I have no idea.
Step 18: Continue to cut up the rest of the meat, breaking the bones when necessary.
Step 19: Place all meat in a pot and rinse with water.
Step 20: You are now ready to cook and enjoy! Congratulations!