I couldn't sleep after I awoke at 4am unsure as to why (though I guess I know now). At 8 I finally rose and emerged to an empty house. Shortly after though, Lizbeth came and brought me to her house. There was a pig getting stabbed and a whole group of people watching. I then watched the entire process of using a knife to shave it's hair, the gutting, the breaking of the rib cage, the joy Dulce's mom expressed after seeing the blood in a pot, Dulce ripping apart the intestines, and the cutting, weighing, and selling of the meat. Absolutely crazy. Llegó la luz so we watched a movie (Patrick Swayze as a transgender male?). I met another person in a house way por arriba and swam a little in a new river. I taught an informal English class to 4 jovenes. We played cards and I tried to teach them how to shuffle. Then the storm came. I think I may have said before that I had seen and heard the biggest thunder storm ever here but I lied. Today was the biggest. And now I know why.
At 6pm, my mom called. Roy passed away just this morning. For those of you who don't know, he had been an incredible addition to our family for many years now. He loved my Grandma Irene, and she loved him. The two of them were wonderful together and it all started in church with a simple tap from him on my Grandma's nose as tears fell down her cheeks. You couldn't help but feel so special around him. Despite all his pains, he never failed to hold tight my hand, kiss my cheek, and tell every woman in the room how beautiful they were. His family also became our family and they fit right in with our chaos of love. He was a talented glass sculptor (I'm sorry, I know that's not the right name) and created amazing things with his hands. His smile stretched wide across his fragile, wrinkled face and easily lit up any room. He used a cane and was unsteady on his feet but that never stop him from enjoying his glass of gin (I pray that's the right alcohol but my memory is uncertain). He told stories but also listened so intently; I could have sat and talked to him for hours whenever he was at the house.
With complete sincerity I can say that he is one of the greatest examples of a true gentleman I have ever and will ever know. He was like a grandfather to me. I can hear, even worlds away now, how his gentle voice would say my name. I'm finding that I am teetering back and forth from believing it's real to not in seconds and it's as if there are two realities happening at once. But though I'm not back home with this reality, I still felt as if a part of my chest was sucked away and a void was left when my mother spoke those words. None of you will read this for a few weeks so please know now that I was with you as much as my spirit could be. I sent prayers and love with my tears and I wished (and still wish) I could have been there to say "Nos vemos pronto." Because we will all see each other soon in the vastness of eternity. And until then; Lord, take care of your new angel. We were blessed to have him for as long as we did and now he deserves to be at your side. Roy? I love you. And I'm sorry I wasn't there.
Buenas noches.
Julie, we also had the biggest thunder I've ever heard the night before Roy's funeral!! Though you wanted to be, you didn't have to be in any one location to be with Roy. He is with you always now and I know he will look out for you. You have some powerful angels watching over you and I'm so thankful as my human body prevents me from doing so. I love you so much!!
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